HALT

When I was at my Therapist this last Tuesday  He gave me a little exercise to do when i feel like I am getting angry.  HALT
Hungry
Anxious
Lonely
Tired

Anytime I feel as though I have Anger building up I need to take the time to see if I am each one of these things instead.  The whole point really is taking the time to self analyze before I act out in anger.  I have found that  most likely I am experiencing one or more of these feelings when I am angry.  Sometimes all of them.  WHat I Feel I am really going through is Grief.  I have never experienced grief like this before.  Grief over loss I understand.  Dealing with adultery is different.  Gina is still here.  She has not left.  I cannot lay my finger on exactly what it is I have lost but I feel like I have had an amputation without anesthetic.  I weep uncontrollably at very inconvenient time.  I find myself spacing out for several minutes at a time.   I imagine it could be PSTD.

I really want it to stop now.  I Want to be strong.  I want to have control over my emotions.  I want to do good work at my job and enjoy my work.  I want Joy in my life..,

Loneliness is the hardest feeling for me to overcome.  I really do not have a close friend to help anymore.  At least not until my relationship with Gina heals more.

God, Help me with Loneliness,  Help my to be strong and have Joy in my life.  Lord, please give me a better outlook about work,  Please help me top stay focused on my work and not zone out.  Lord I need to be focused and in the moment at all times.  Please Forgive me of me sins.  Help me to overcome the bizzare dreams I have been having.  Please keep me from forming inappropriate relationships while I am so lonely.

Lord, please guide and protect Gina.  please bring her back to me as a Wife, Lover, friend.  Help us to have a a better relationship than we did before,  grounded in Love for Jesus Christ.  

Lord please Guide and protect Halbert.  Please help him to grow strong in his faith.  Please keep him from placing his faith in anyone but Jesus.  Please Forgive his sins and keep him from great sin in the future.  Please help him to have joy in his life and not be depressed like me.  Lord he knows what is going on.  Please uphold his spirit.  Please help him to forgive his parents who are both sinners in need of grace.

TIM